Ottawa -

 

Health Canada has approved a new treatment called ‘Blockitol’ which allows the frontal lobe to stop any repeating of the O-O-O-Ozempic song from getting stuck on a loop in your head. The original song, by the band ‘Pilot’, was a big hit in the 70’s, and the original lyric altered by the pharma giant, Novo Nordisk. “We have heard the outcry from the public and we had been working on such a blocker since the early days of co-opted pop hits for ads.” Said a spokesperson for the company. "I’m sure you remember the misuse of the Aretha Franklin classic, ‘Deliver Me’ used by Pizza Hut... well we’d like to prevent that from happening again. I’m not saying the initial trials went all that well, there were instances of immediate insanity and some eye-gouging, but we persevered and that’s what we’re all about -- making sure that we have more medication to cover the tracks of our disastrous medication.” Industry experts were astonished at the alarming number of initial trial volunteers who said they would do anything to have the tune stop creeping into their head.